When it comes to intimacy, many people have private fantasies that add an extra layer of excitement to their experiences. A professional sex therapist has recently shed light on what she has found to be two of the most common fetishes people discuss in her practice. Her insights offer a fascinating look into the diverse landscape of human desire, revealing that what many consider unusual might be more common than they think, and vice versa.
According to sex therapist Charlene Douglas, the most frequently shared fantasy revolves around threesomes. This longstanding and popular fantasy involves the idea of incorporating a third person into a sexual scenario, representing a common curiosity about group dynamics and shared pleasure. However, Douglas notes a significant trend on the rise in recent years: voyeurism. This fetish involves being watched during intimate acts, and an increasing number of people are reporting that it serves as a powerful turn-on for them.
Douglas provided a real-world example from her practice, describing a couple who discovered their greatest sexual satisfaction came from staying in hotel rooms with large, uncovered windows. For them, the thrill and arousal were directly linked to the possibility of being seen by strangers. This desire for an audience, or the fantasy of one, highlights how performance and exhibition can intensify feelings of excitement and connection for some individuals, moving intimacy from a purely private act into a more exposed, thrilling space.
In contrast to these more common fantasies, Douglas also shared a fetish that, in her professional experience, is rare but memorable. She recalled a male client who had a powerful olfactory fetish, specifically for the strong, natural scent of a woman’s vulva. For this individual, this particular smell was the key to his arousal. He traced the origin of this preference back to a teenage dare involving smelling a woman’s underwear, an experience that unexpectedly sparked a lifelong sexual association.
What makes this latter case particularly interesting, Douglas explained, was the evolution within the relationship. Over time, his partner became increasingly turned on by his fetish, not necessarily by the act itself, but by his intense passion and the vulnerability he showed. This demonstrates how open communication about our deepest desires can sometimes transform a personal fetish into a shared source of intimacy and connection, strengthening the bond between partners in unexpected ways.
